Corruption

One of the biggest Achilles heels in America's legal system is the astonishing possibility that a jury will be staffed by slobbering morons, so incredibly stupid that it's a wonder they can even wipe themselves (if they do at all). Nowhere is this more apparent in the case of 70-year-old sociopath Ronald W. Ellis, who viciously attacked neighbor Cheri Monson by luring her out of her apartment then dousing her with a bucket of urine, feces, and vomit so vile the police were made ill when interviewing her. This was certainly not the first incident. Ellis had a history of harrassing Monson and even an assault conviction in 1998

If we had a competent government, Ellis would have been sent to the gallows already. Instead, however, the aforementioned jury of imbeciles acquitted this excuse for a human being.

Additionally there are unconfirmed reports that this may be a racial issue - this is to say, the perpetrator was black and so too was the jury and thus racial "solidarity" may have played a part in sabotaging a slam-dunk case. We re-iterate we do not have confirmation of this.

Obama donor Cynthia Stroum got the plum posting of ambassador to Luxembourg and ended up being an unholy terror. We called it back in 2009, folks.

Lieutenant Major Garvin (his name is really Major) caused a stir when he harassed employees at a Starbucks, threatening poor police response times if they didn't give him free coffee. He was fired but the idiotic arbiter George Mayer called for his reinstatement and full back pay. It doesn't take a genius to see that this flagrant folly could not have a good ending.

Now Garvin has gotten in trouble for parking his cruiser, while off-duty we might add, in a handicapped spot. Garvin's flimsy excuse is that he was running late to referee an AAU basketball tournament and got the OK from security to park in the handicapped spot. Of course, a rent-a-cop's approval does not equal a license to break the law.

Short yellow light times at intersections have been proven to increase the number of traffic violations and accidents. Conversely, increasing the yellow light duration can dramatically reduce red-light violations at an intersection. Despite this, some local governments have completely ignored the safety benefit of longer yellow light time and installed red-light cameras (themselves Orwellian) and shortened yellow light duration all to steal money from the citizens.

The cities caught "red handed" include:

  • Chattanooga, TN
  • Dallas, TX
  • Springfield, MO
  • Lubbock, TX
  • Nashville, TN
  • Union City, CA

D.A.G. says: It is our belief that yellow lights ought to have standardized timing across the city, should be sufficiently long, and even display a countdown timer. If you're ever wondering why such painfully obvious improvements are not made, now you know. Stupidity, incompetence, and greed.

King County Sheriff's Deputy Paul Schene was terrified. He was fearing for his life because a bratty 15 year old girl kicked her shoe at him while she was in her holding cell. Rather than caging in this violent menace by shutting the cell door, he did what any red-blooded warrior would do: charged into the cell, tackled her, throwing her into the wall for good measure, then proceeded to punch her while she was down. He even needed another officer's help to put her in cuffs. This wuss even claimed he was afraid of being injured by the girl, explaining his actions.

Surely this cowardly act of brutality would result in the immediate firing and imprisonment of the perpetrator, but alas, only half of that came to be. Schene was fired but thanks to not one, but two inept juries, both of which were deadlocked, despite the airtight evidence of the video. The King County prosecutor's office refused to have a third trial, freeing Schene of any criminal charges.

Dearborn, MI cop Cpl. Edward Sanchez had ulterior motives when he seized pot from suspects. He used the plants for his own personal consumption, even baking it into brownies. This proved to be his undoing as he had such a wild trip he and his wife, who had also consumed some, believed they were dying of a marijuana overdose and called 911. Actually, they believed they were already dead.

Sanchez has since resigned. The real question is what kind of training these cops are receiving on drugs and their effects that an officer could believe he's dying of a pot overdose?

Top employees at the Securities and Exchange Commission, whose job it is to prevent financial crimes such as those by Enron, Arthur Andersen, and Bernard Madoff, have been spending their taxpayer-funded time on such quality websites as Naughty.com, Skankwire, and YouPorn.

At the request of Senator Chuck Grassley, R-IA, an investigation was conducted which found at least 31 "serious offenders" which is to say there could be many more who only looked at a little porn. 17 of these government-subsidized perverts were senior SEC officers whose salaries ranged from $100-222,000. One senior attorney at the SEC headquarters spent as many as eight hours a day looking at porn. When he filled up the hard drive on his government computer, he started storing the surplus smut on CDs and DVDs that accumulated in boxes in his offices. Unemployed dirty old men in their parents' basements are put to shame by the sheer determination of this perv!

And it wasn't just dirty old men. A female accountant attempted to access porn websites 1800 times in a two-week period and had 600 porno pics on her hard drive. Better still, another accountant used his SEC computer to upload his own dirty videos. No word of where  these videos can be found, but if anyone finds them, please let us know. We'd be happy to show this government-funded moron's shriveled peepee to his 300 million bosses.

DAG Says: Do not let these scum remain anonymous, SEC. Publish their names. Humiliate them and let it serve as a warning to every other corrupt idiot in government that the American public will not tolerate waste.

A Daytona Beach cop, Lt. Major Garvin (yes his first name is Major), terrorized a Starbucks for two years demanding free coffee, cutting in front of paying customers, and threatening a slow police response time if he was not given what he wanted.

The officer's tantrum allegedly was worded "If something happens, either we can respond really fast or we could respond really slow. I've been coming here for years and I've been getting whatever I want. I'm the difference between you getting a two-minute response time, if you needed a little help, or a 15 minutes response time."

Starbucks reported Garvin's corrupt conduct to the police department who administered a polygraph test which Garvin failed. He was fired, rightly, but the story did not end there. Remember, this is a man given to petulant temper tantrums. Garvin demanded his job back and the idiotic arbiter George Mayer gave the baby his lollipop.

Not only does Major Garvin get his undeserved job back but he gets $87,000 in back pay. Money stolen from your paycheck is given to his. Isn't that nice?

GM is lobbying hard to keep government money from going to Aptera - who makes a three-wheeled electric car - so they can keep it all to themselves. This isn't the first time they held back an electric car. Remember the EV1?

New Orleans police officer Robert Evangelist, fired for beating an unarmed man, Robert Davis, on Bourbon Street in 2005, has been reinstated to his job. The reinstatement was ordered by Louisiana's 4th Circuit Court of Appeals.

D.A.G. Says: Meanwhile, courts are not ordering reinstatement of the many honest Americans laid off from their jobs.

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